He Loves Me Not!!!!!!!

Abused physically and emotionally, wanting to break free of the poison in the marriage but not knowing where to go or how to start over. He takes always and keeps what he has for himself, only comes around when it's payday. Every time she decides to leave he says how much she's needed and loved and as always she decides that one more chance is deserved. He's sweet, caring, and loving , just the person she fell in love with, then a week later he gets comfortable and the nasty abusive person returns. She doesn't think she can find anyone who loves her because he's done his job of convincing her that she's ugly and only he will give her even an ounce of attention. She convinces herself that starting over is too hard and she's too old to make it as a single parent. He has total control of her emotionally and now she becomes dependent on him for everything.
In the early 60's,70's and 80's this would have been partially acceptable but in the century of so many resources, the question becomes " Why do so many people stay in relationship like this?"

Will They Make it to The Altar?

He's been waiting on her for 9 years. Every time he proposes she ask for more time. She is unemployed, he is retired military with couple rental properties at 100% occupancy plus a supervisory job. Everything she needs he gives her. The friendship is great, conversation is hours long. Now am I crazy to assume that in this economy he is a perfect candidate for a husband. We are always told that you should be friends first, so if they can tolerate being in the same space and stayed friends for 9 years, why not take it to the next level. He's divorced so he knows what he's looking for, her on the other has been single for the 11 years and love living by herself. In that 9 years he has not dated anyone else but how long is too long to wait around. Maybe she's comfortable in believing he won't leave but a good man like that is always in high demand. In my opinion, he should make himself scarce and let her realize his value. I'm ready to snatch him up myself.  Is it premature to assume that she will only say yes after he's found someone else?

Relationship or Relationshit

She cheated three (3) times and each time he caught her and ask what he can do to fix the situation. Each time she said it was a mistake and that it wouldn't happen again. They do have children but they're all grown so him trying to make it work must be love. Of course she doesn't realize it or maybe she's an undercover nympho. She cheats a fourth (4th) time and he confronts her and her sex partner. It get physically, he moves out and files for divorce. He volunteer to give her the house so she doesn't contest the divorce. One year later she's lost the home, kids are upset at her, and the new man has moved on. Now she's rethinking her action and trying to sabotage his relationship. Personally I would have left after the second time because it's obvious it was a one way love affair. They were married for 23 years so I understand his hesitation but after so many unsuccessful attempts at fixing the relationshit. Should he now go back because she's learn the errors of her way and wants to recommit. Should there be a time frame on forgiveness

To Be Or Not To Be

Does it make sense to be married when all he does is work, eat, and sleep. I completely understand that paying the bills is important but what about everything else. Someone has to tend to the kids, clean the house, cook and make sure everyone has clean laundry. What happens if both decide to only work and sleep